The stationary store by my house

I do Origami, I know its odd but its something I picked up and I like it ok. So here's the thing. There is a store by my house that sells paper and paper accessories. So I wandered in there today on my way home from my 3 hour stint at work. I asked the shopkeeper if he had any origami paper, that I needed black and white paper. I'm working on an origami chess set and need black and white paper. The shopkeep in turn looked at me like I just pulled a pink elephant out of my ass. He told me he didn't know what I meant. In turn I again said I was looking for origami. Again, a look of total wonderment. Now I was getting a little wierded out by this guy. He then says he has never heard of origami, he knows not what I say. I again said, origami, you know, paperfolding. He still didn't know what I meant. I asked him how long he had been selling paper and paper accessories. About 20 years. I said and you've never heard of origami or paperfolding, he just shook his head. I walked out feeling quite stressed over the whole episode.

Angriest Young Man

What happened to Geena Davis

What ever happened to Geena Davis. She used to be in lots of movies and I don't think I've seen her since Beetlejuice. I mean she's pretty enough. Unless she smiles, because she shows to much gum. Not a good gum to tooth ratio, anyway if anyone knows what happened to Geena Davis please let me know.

Something else I won't eat

I decided I can't eat any sort of Chutney, like Mango Chutney. The sole reason being that Chutney sounds like some sort of communter train to some upity out of the way resort town that caters to urbanites from large centers. Hey thats just one mans opinion.

Weather Network Message of the Day

This was left in a Batman Villan type voice.

Its that time of the year again, happy pride week 2005 to all the gang at the weather network. I hope you all have happy wonderful joyous time. We kick it off on Sat with the annual dyke march down the young street strip. Where the gals can show there bare breasts to the delight and enjoyment of both genders, hmm. Then on Sunday the party really kicks into high gear with annual pride parade. Butt cheeks chaps, pierced nipples, dildos and ex-penises are just a few of the many sights to see. There will be endless fun and profanities to be had. So leave your inhibitions at the door cuz party poopers need not apply. Lets all get on out there and have a really big gay old time. Love you, Bye

Current Fav CD

Cats with OCD

This girl at work was told her cat has Obesive Compulsive Disorder and the he needs prozac. So now she spends $40 a month to buy her OCD cat prozac!!

What a day!!

I actually broke a sweat at work today, now you ask why is he posting this. Well the thing is I tend to sit on my ass and project the appearance of productivity. For some reason I actually had to do something today and man I broke a sweat, I don't think I've ever gotten even winded at work. I have always worked desk jobs because of my fear of manual labor, but if this continues I may have to find a more stagnant job. Suggestions are welcome.

Thank god the new Foo Fighters CD is out

Sounds pretty good to me right now, but i'm kinda baked.

Excersise, no way!!

If walking is so good for you why does my mailman look like Jabba The Hut!?

Why do things change?

I have a little bit of a rant today. My best friends parents are moving today. Now it's actually two best friends, brothers, and I have lived next to them for 21 years. Now that's not entirely true. We all moved away from home to different cities about 6 years ago. We have always stayed close, we are really just brothers from different mothers you know. Anyway, the issue is that we are always home on holidays and those times are spent equally between our two homes, actually more their parents than mine (mine are a little uptight). So you know I would wake up in the morning and just scoot over to Steve French's house (fake name) and we would eat breakfast and get baked. It was a good life. If It was 2am and I was bored I would just go rap on Steve French's (fake name) window and we would just chill and get baked you know. Now when I go home to my parents I am going to be totally alone, no one, just me and my stepdad who tends to fall asleep with the remote for the TV on his crotch so I have to use a broom handle to get it. Anyway this is upsetting me today so I though I would write about it.

Milo And Felix, American Idols

Most people don't know I have rabbits, andeven fewer know that they were guest judges on American Idol.

Testing Out an Audible Post

Weather Network Message of the Day

Another fine message courtesy of the weather network.

Thank you for taking Anne Marie Sweeney off the air and hopefully off the planet. She is disgusting! We turn her on at night just to have a laugh. She looks and acts like a teenage hooker. She does no justice for The Weather Network. She flirts with the camera, her short tight skirts at her middle age. She puts those slits in her skirts. She runs around like a mare in heat! She can't stand still for 2 seconds. We love Suzanne Feliz and Chris St. Clair. Bye for now.

This guy calls all the time

Weather Network Message of the Day

Could you please stop showing the temperature, thank you.

What I'm cooking

1 pkg Fusilli
Gorgonzola Cheese sauce
Cream Cheese
Mozzarella Cheese
1 can Chunky Tomatoes
Spinach
Mushrooms
Broccoli
Roasted Red Peppers
SunDried Tomatoes

Sometimes you just hate things

So I decided that I need a cause in my life, you know something to fight for. So I've decided that I am against picketing, I just don't know how to show it.

What do I listen to?

I got an I-Pod and I need some new music to listen to. What's the best stuff out there right now?

I just bought that DVD from a pirate

The movie Illuminati was pretty ridiculous. I was too hot to do anything so I watched almost all 4 hours of it. It was the crazy conspiracy theory involving ancient satanic guilds, Freemasonry, and the American Bush family. It looks like it was produced at the Weekly World News.

A good argument for church

I am currently reading Dan Browns, Angels and Demons. Hence the Illuminatic look of the blog. I think I may change the look to reflect what I am reading at the time. Anyway, so I'm reading this book, now I'm not a god fearing man, but I read one paragraph in this good that actually made good sense as to what church should mean to people in our culture that now has answers that the bible once purposed to answer. So I decided to post it, here it is.

"For Sylvie, the church had always been an innocuous entity...a place of fellowship and introspection...sometimes just a place to sing out loud without people starting at her. The church recorded the benchmarks of her life, funerals, weddings, baptisms, holidays, and it asked for nothing in return. Even the monetary dues were voluntary. Her children emerged from Sunday School every week uplifted, filled with ideas about helping others and being kinder. What could possibly be wrong with that?"

By far the best argument for church I have ever heard.

The benches around my dwelling

I opted to use the word dwelling simply because I am looking through the yellow pages. Have you ever noticed that the only place in the world they still use words like this are in the yellow pages. Have you ever looked for clothes in the yellow pages. They are not listed under clothes they are listed under apparel, who the hell still uses that word. Anyway I'm getting a little of topic. I live in a large urban center and havve noticed something odd. We have these benches all around the city lining the sidewalks. There are actually people who sit on these benches as a pastime. They just sit there and watch the world go by. I've been to other cities that have benches that sit empty day after day. Why are these benches getting used, what is the attraction?

Wacko Jacko not so wacko afterall

In one of the more publicized legal battles of the century Michael Jackson has been found not guilty on all ten counts against him. Ranging from lude acts on a child to supplying alcohol to a minor for the purposes of a felony. I say way to go Michael I knew you would beat it.

To the rescue

On Friday I was driving down Ridout Street by the BlackFriars bridge and the car ahead of me stopped. On the side of the road I saw a small racoon that looked real sick.

There were dozens of animal rights stickers on the back og this car, and the woman who stepped out motioned for me to join her. I figured 'What the hell,' and joined her.

The racoon (raccoon? It looks wrong both ways), hid under the car. They bite pretty quick, and this one had distemper or infections of some sort, so we weren't about to stick our arms underneath for kicks. She was calling people from her radical group, the London Animal Alliance, for some supplies for saving this guy. I think most of it's legs were broken.

Her friend Florine, a leader of the group, and her fairly attractive sister came with her net. After we got it out it was tangled in the net, and in the process of getting it to the cage fairly attractive sister was bit badly. When we cut the net up I recommended returning it to Canadian Tire because they take anything.

Just a cartoon

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My work situation

I have a meeting with Cathy Horney on Monday.

Where is Old Zealand?

Can someone please tell me why New Zealand is new. I have never heard of Zealand, is there or was there a Zealand and if not then why and the hell do they call it New Zealand?

Holy shit thats the guy

I just saw the picture of the 'EATGOAT' license plate guy. Prick. Did you notice the little 'eat more goat bumper' sticker.

Jose's death pool

Right now I have no air conditioning. My fish tank temperature is 86 F.

Unfortunately, the fish generally enjoys to live in water at 76 F. Does anyone have a good solution? Aside from springing for air conditioning, which I won't do.

If not, I'm taking the 16th of June in Jose's death pool. Entry to the contest is free, and prize money is guaranteed. (all gauruntee's void upon winning)

Thank you

The book I just read

Just finished Brave New World today. It was kinda wierd. Alot of Shakespeare, sex-hormone chewing gum and blood surrogate human assembly lines.

Those little plastic bags, no not those ones

I actually ran out of plastic bags from the grocery store the other day. I couldn't believe it. You collect so many of them to the point where you complain about having too many. Then the day came when I went to grab a bag for my lunch and the bag spot was empty. I was mystified. I have never seen this before. I didn't know what to do, I couldn't bring my sad little lunch without a bag. I just can't walk down the street holding whatever frozen entree was on sale that week. I would look quite the fool. Then I went to tidy up the living room, I had nothing to collect the garbage in. I can tell you this, never again will I complain about the buildup of little plastic bags.

Marjorie Allen

When the weather gets all nice suddenly you feel like quitting your job and *I have a yeast infection...* moving or doing nothing. But you need a a job to make some money, I guess. That or some dope, right.

What if I changed my name

I was thinking about what I would change my name to if I was so inclined to do so. I was thinking names like Max Power, or Ryan Diamond (Simply for the pickup line, Diamonds last forever). Then I came to thinking I would change my name to something like Crappy McFartson and then I would find the cure for cancer and thy would have to name a day after me and it would be Crappy McFartson day.

Drivers in the morning

You can always tell who is not going to work in the morning. These people who sit in the right lane on a red light blocking your well planned escape route from traffic congestion. Then these slow drivers, like no one else has anywhere to go at 8am. I think a bylaw should be placed that all peoples should be forced to drive as wrecklessly and aggressively as possible between the hours of 7am and 10am.